How to improve interpersonal relationships?
It is important to keep in mind that, although the skills derived from self-knowledge are essential for good personal development, social skills are key to being successful in your community. When we interact with people who are important, in our lives we interact by action or omission, this is why some interactions are positive, and others have the opposite effect. It is something normal in human beings, inevitably, sometimes these failures can subtract in relationships.
Let's understand others
It is one of the main keys, undoubtedly, to know and understand the other person. In fact, it could be considered the base, without this, it is difficult to achieve the rest of the objectives that we have. Interestingly, actions that can add up for us, others can interpret them differently and could generate the opposite effect to what we expect. To understand others, listening without judging is essential, taking care of their concerns even if they are indifferent to us.
It is a good plan, to make important for us, those things that are important for the other, in this way, the others will feel that we understand them. An example: Give importance to the things that your son transmits to you, otherwise, he will feel misunderstood and that he is not important to you. This is one of the golden rules to improve personal relationships and base them on love, respect and trust.
Let's pay attention to details
The little things, both positive and negative, are the ones that have a giant impact on relationships, and therefore it is important to take care of them. Frequent demonstrations of affection and generosity undoubtedly add to the relationship, unlike ironies, reproaches, embarrassments, which cause the opposite effect.
- A good morning kiss every morning.
- Greet respectfully at work, public transport.
- Give the thanks.
- Take an interest in the health of your family and that of your friends.
- Share a friendly time with your children.
- A smile to those who need it.
- A phone call.
- Prepare your partner's favorite food.
- Being a shoulder for your loved ones for when they need to cry.
- A good hug when words are unnecessary.
Keep our commitments
When we break an important promise, we always take with it a part of the person and the trust they placed in us, we also lose credibility and when we make a new promise they will no longer believe us. People build our expectations based on the promises of others, that is why, regardless of the circumstances, it is better not to make promises that we have no intention or guarantee of fulfilling.
It is more common than it seems, to feel guilty for disappointing that person to whom we made a promise that we could not keep, or that after making it we consider that it is not appropriate.
Clarify your expectations.
It is very likely that at some point you have established unspoken expectations based on both the other person's role and your own. For this reason, when the other person meets your expectations you feel fulfilled, but when this does not happen, it makes you feel bad. It is common to make assessments of the other person when they do not meet your expectations, but if you do not clarify your expectations, the only person responsible for the negative situations that are generated is yourself, even if you try to place the responsibility on the other.
This is why it is extremely important to speak clearly with other people about what they expect from each other within the relationship, especially if they are at the beginning of it.
In labor relations, expectations are often not clarified at the time of hiring, and situations occur in which, for example, the contract stipulates that they work until 6:00 pm, and when the employee leaves, the supervisor is disappointed. because I expected more commitment to the company; and the same happens the other way around, there are employees who stay late at work so that their effort and commitment can be noticed, but they are usually unproductive.
In the case of children, expectations must be established gradually and permanently, both from parents to children, and vice versa. That is why it is extremely important that you ask your children what they expect of you and become sensitive to their expectations. At first this usually seems complicated, but it is meaningful to do it, with this we avoid misunderstandings and disappointments in the future.
Be a person of integrity
When we have personal integrity, we form the foundation for a relationship of trust. If we are attentive to detail and keep our promises, but lack integrity, it will not be possible to build a lasting personal relationship based on trust. Having integrity is not more than simply not breaking the truth; it is also keeping our word no matter where, when, or with whom we are. Here we can see the difference more clearly:
- When you choose your words so that they correspond to something that has actually happened, you are a truthful person.
- When you choose your words in a way that corresponds to something that will happen in reality, you are a person of integrity.
In other words, integrity involves keeping promises and meeting expectations in addition to simply telling the truth. Being loyal to others even when they're not present is one way to be honest, which will build trust with those who are present at the time.
If we are nice and friendly to a person in their presence, and then criticize them in their absence, we are not being a person of integrity. Another case could be, that they tell us something clearly confidential, and then we tell someone closer, this is considered disloyalty.
sincerely apologize
If for reasons of life, you could not keep your promises or meet the expectations that others have of you, it is best to apologize as quickly as possible, and with your heart in your hand.
To apologize, we must work on our self-confidence, people with low self-esteem have problems apologizing, because it makes them feel vulnerable. However, sincere apologies generate positivity, while insincere and forced apologies have the opposite effect.
Give unconditional love
When we love people unconditionally, we help them feel safe and valued for who they are, for their essence. If we do not give our unconditional love, other people feel limited by fear of the consequences that are associated with not listening to our advice, demands, conditions and requests.
With this, we understand that offering our unconditional love favors cooperation, contribution, self-discipline and integrity on the part of the person who receives it, because they will feel free to behave, express themselves fully as they wish to be.
Unconditional love means loving without expecting something in return, if we practice it daily, we can be sure that sooner rather than later, we will receive what we are expecting from other people.
Trust what you say and do
A good way to improve interpersonal relationships is to always have a confident attitude, so you can generate trust in others. When we act insecure and doubtful, we trigger a defensive response from others. Practicing trust is an everyday thing to do; we must give ourselves the opportunity, and we can be sure that our interpersonal relationships will improve.
Fear is a common trait in human beings; it can strain communication and become an obstacle to interpersonal relationships. We don't need to become talkative; we simply need to recapture that spark of naturalness in conversation.
Smile
When we ask ourselves how to improve interpersonal relationships, many ways come to mind that may be complicated at first, but this is one of the most important and simplest, smiling. A smile can open many doors for us, smiles break down barriers and build an emotional climate of kindness, most important of all, it doesn't cost a penny.
Let's think of the smile as a sign of acceptance of peace, it is a gesture as kind as good communication. The smile breaks the ice and inspires confidence, there is nothing better than improving our interpersonal relationships in a way as simple as smiling. It is proven that people feel safer to approach someone who smiles than a person who does not.
Importance of learning how to improve interpersonal relationships
when we learn how to improve interpersonal relationships, we are happier and we have a much more advanced ability to socialize, let us remember that these are present from the beginning of our lives, in any of the areas where we operate.
All human beings need to move in an environment that stimulates us, that allows us to grow and improve day by day, an environment where we feel identified, both in the family, school and work environment.
Among the social skills we learn as children are the skills to make friends and to show others our feelings. Actions such as introducing ourselves, establishing a conversation, participating in common activities for our age, asking for or giving help, complimenting or apologizing, as well as expressing affection, are basic to being able to function satisfactorily in our closest environment.
Similarly, from a young age we should be taught other techniques, such as self-control, asking for permission, knowing how to respond in moments of anger and hostility, avoiding problems or dealing with somewhat more complicated situations, such as a problem, a fight, an accusation or a negotiation. .
Good interpersonal relationships make us feel competent in the most diverse situations and obtain a social stimulus that brings us balance and joy.
We need to make new friends and maintain old friendships, share our experiences with others and empathize with what others live, empathy is another key to good interpersonal relationships. Feeling alone and isolated causes psychological suffering that is very difficult to manage for anyone, regardless of their age.
If personal relationships produce a feeling of anxiety, we should think about the possibility of treating ourselves with an expert (psychologist), who will help us communicate better through simple and accurate techniques.
The idea is to become more open with others, it is not abnormal to need help to achieve this, for this the specialists have studied and all the information that we give them about us is completely confidential and is used to find the correct tools to develop our self-esteem and self-confidence, so that we can have satisfactory interpersonal relationships.
The relationships we make with other people throughout our lives are significant, others play an important role in our personal development and well-being. Through others we obtain social reinforcements that support our adaptation to the environment. Know how to improve interpersonal relationships It opens many doors for us, however, lacking these tools can cause us difficulties in our daily development.
Our communication and interpersonal skills should not be evaluated solely by whether other people's behavior meets our own needs, but also by the degree to which our own attitudes satisfy others. Perhaps that's why there's a saying that "you have to give in order to receive."
If this article has interested you, do not forget to check: NLP techniques.
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